I am hearing a lot about how many people’s relationships with those around them are challenging them and there seem to be a lot of complete breakdowns of relationships going on currently as well.
What I term as ‘toxic’ relationships come in all shapes and sizes and from all parts of your life. We are being pushed now, by the energies coming into the Earth, to heal our relationships with others, so that they are authentic, however to heal your relationships with others you need to first look at yourself.
To me a toxic relationship is one where you don’t feel that you can be your true self, where there is no authenticity, and where there is a lot of compromise.
Most relationships are karmic and this is why so many people struggle with them, however it is my belief that the person that irritates you the most is one of your greatest teachers as they are reflecting back to you things in yourself that you dislike and you need to take a look at and heal. Being truthful with yourself is key as you look at the issues you are being presented with, so that you can address them in yourself and heal them, so bringing your body mind and soul back to a place of balance.
Once you have healed something in yourself, you will no longer notice it in others around you. Of course it may be when you take a look at yourself that the issue isnt yours and is being projected onto you by the person concerned. In these cases you need to look at the person with compassion, forgive them for not wanting to take responsibility for their own experiences and send them unconditional love.
Unconditional love, compassion and forgiveness are key components of true healing as they know no bounds and have no judgement or attachment. You are not condoning any words or actions that have caused pain, you are freeing yourself from the toxic energy and attachment that has connected you to the other person, so that you can grow and continue your journey.
What most people don’t realise is that the relationship they have with someone in the here and now is just the tip of the iceburg and it is my understanding especially since I have been working on a much deeper level in peoples energy, that those people where the relationships are really toxic, will have had many many lives together that have never been healed properly.
There are many kinds of love, most of which have attachment and many people also mistake the energies of soul recognition from past lives as true love as their souls pull each other together to clear the karma between them. More often than not they end up in relationships that continue the same dramas and attachment that they have experienced together many times before.
So for example, ‘I’ll love you if you don’t talk to any other men’, I’ll love you if you don’t look at another woman’ ‘I’ll love you if you do everything around the house’, ‘I’ll love you if you do well at school’. These sorts of beliefs and attachment are all being put out subconsciously but they create drama within a relationship and even trauma and complete breakdown of it. This attachment relates to all kinds of relationships including intimate relationships, family, friends, neighbours or colleagues.
We are reliving past life scenarios constantly with those around us without even realising what is truly going on but what this helps to do is make our energy more compressed and so us more negative. It helps to create drama which more often than not others get drawn into and make worse. When there is drama going on it is important to look at whose drama it really is, because if it’s not yours then you need to step away from it and if it is yours then you need to address it, see where it has come from and do the healing and make the changes in your life so that all the negative ties between you and the other person are broken and cleared, leaving just the ties of pure love. Then you can see the authenticity of the relationship with that person and so make choices as to how you wish that relationship to continue ( or not) based on the clarity that healing will have given you.
When you move into the heart and look with love and compassion, your decisions will be based on what is for the highest good of all and sometimes that means a bit of ‘tough love’ coming into play. Relationships need to be authentic including your relationship with yourself so you need to learn how to reconnect with yourself and your soul. Decompressing your energy, which is part of the work that I do, starts the process of your reconnection with your Soul which is a limitless being who understands what unconditional love is.
Where there aretoxic relationships I do a lot of clearing of negative ties, retrieving soul fragments and energy and clearing of past lives
to help you to see what needs to be changed in order to be able to move forward. This work can be done for all relationships where there are any kinds of issues.
Healing family relationships and ancestral programming is as important as healing intimate relationships. When you heal any relationship you are not only healing yourself but helping to heal the other person and any one else that is connected. This in turn helps to improve self-worth and lead to you feeling empowered to be your true self. We will be exploring this further in my workshop Finding the Love Within.
