Families carry a lot of karma that needs to be addressed and healed, which is why we have these relationships. A large proportion of families are deemed dysfunctional because there have been many lives that have been experienced together where there has been trauma that hasn’t been properly healed within the family group.
We as individuals often end up repeating the same lessons over and over again which creates ingrained patterns, programmes and traits in us. The same goes for our family groups and then these ingrained family patterns, programmes and traits end up being passed from one generation to the next creating learned behaviours.
I remember one of my brothers saying to me years ago that after his divorce he realised that ‘we are our parents until we stop and think!’ At the time it heightened my awareness of myself and how I parented my children as I became more aware of the belief systems and reactions that were in me as second nature because I had learned them from my parents. I know that my parents did the best that they were able to do as parents and indeed in life, with the knowledge that they had at the time. I addressed some of these belief systems and behaviours in myself so that I changed the way I parented my children, so that I did what i felt was best for them and us as a family rather than what I had been taught I should do.
It takes a willingness to go inward to discover why there is disharmony within a family unit so that it can be healed. Issues within a family can often be harder to deal with because ‘blood is thicker than water’ and so we may let family members get away with things we wouldn’t allow others to get away with and because people may misinterpret what loving unconditionally really means. Sometimes ‘tough love’ needs to be exercised to push family members into taking responsibility for their own actions and the consequences of them so that they are empowered to address their issues and heal them.
When we recognise that healing needs to take place for the whole family we can stop negative behaviours, traits and belief systems from continuing to be passed down from generation to generation. We can identify family karma that needs to be addressed, healed and balanced as well and so we change the whole family dynamic.
It is my belief that originally the family unit was meant to be one that was loving and nurturing, allowing each family member to be their greatest self within the family unit without jealousy, competition, resentment or any other emotion becoming involved that would affect self-worth and self-confidence.
I feel that the family unit was the place to start encouraging each individual to develop their skills and to offer support and love so that each individual was prepared for moving ‘on purpose’ so that they could achieve what they came to Earth to achieve. I feel there was never meant to be all the attachment there is creating the control dramas that we see within family units.
Sadly ego got in the way and affected the way that individuals within the family unit reacted with each other. Energies from the many other lifetimes that have been experienced together, in different roles have been triggered and affect the relationships often in a negative way. Abuse ( which I see as anything that does not come from the heart) trauma and control dramas have become the norm within many family units and I find have a deeper root cause that when healed can change relationships between family members for the better.
Particularly difficult relationships within a family unit may result from souls agreeing prior to incarnation to sort their karma out within this close relationship, only to get here and not be able to remember that they agreed to do this. Often in these kinds of circumstances they find that different experiences in the current life, trigger the memories of the traumas they experienced previously and so they react in the same way as before not really understanding why and often not actually managing to resolve their issues.
Sometimes stable families can have a wayward child who is seen as the ‘black sheep’ of the family. Often they dont understand why this child has gone off the rails when the others are all deemed ‘normal’ and the family unit is strong and loving. Equally you can have a very dysfunctional family which has two out of three children wayward and the other one behaving in what would be considered to be a ‘normal’ way. It is my belief that it is the past life experiences that we have each had that affects how we interact within a family unit. There are a multitude of ways that these memories can be triggered and most of the time we dont have a full understanding of what the experiences were we just react to the trigger without thinking.
It is said that from birth until the age of 7 a child is in its formative years where its personality can be moulded by its parents and where a lot of behaviours are learned. I would agree to a certain extent with this, however I also feel that the type of people children grow into also depends on the traumas that they have experienced, the belief systems that have been ingrained in them and any abuse that they have experienced not only in this lifetime but in others as well.
From my experience as an energy healer what we see going on in the physical world is only the tip of the iceberg. healing the family needs to start by healing ourselves as when we are prepared to go inward and address our own issues and release them it has a ripple effect on all those around us. Forgiveness is a big part of this healing process and as I have said many times before forgiveness is about letting go of the toxic energy affecting us not condoning what was said or done.
Deeper healing can then be done for the whole family so that trauma, abuse and patterns and programmes that no longer serve the family group can be healed and released along all ancestral and blood lines so that not only the family unit as it is in the current life is healed but also those who have gone before us and those who will follow us will benefit from the healing work.
A lot of the work that I do these days involves healing issues between individual family members as well as for families as units, so that family dynamics can change for the better and family units become more loving and kind towards each other.
If you would like healing for you as an individual or as a family unit then please book an appointment with me. https://peaceful-living.co.uk/appointments If you would like to explore healing the family further and be given some tools to empower you to do some of this work yourself then please consider attending my next Finding The Love Within Workshop in January 2020 which will be exploring this further . For more information please click here https://peaceful-living-workshops.co.uk/ftlw-event-04/
